Blue Boutique just turned 26 years old In April. In that time we’ve had an amazing journey in Utah. We’ve grown from a tiny store in Sugarhouse to 4 locations. We’ve sold more than 3 million sexy items to our customers in that time. We’d now like to know how you uses those items. Take 15 minutes to take our new sex and sexuality survey and let us know what you like to do under the sheets. The survey is anonymous, but if you choose, you can enter to win a $150 gift certificate to the online store.
The survey includes questions about your first time, your favorite sex positions, How open your parents are about sex and sexuality, fantasies, fetishes, What are your favorite sex toys and more.
We plant to publish the results of our survey on the Blue Boutique website in July 2013.
It seems like every man’s dream is to have two women at once, so chances are, you’ve probably been asked to be a part of a ménage a trios by some guy in your life; maybe even more than once. This can be hurtful, especially when asked by the love of your life. Other times, it can be just plain awkward. This is my story of every steamy, strange, or painful threesome encounter I’ve had in my dating history, and what I’ve learned from them.
A few years ago, I was dating a man I thought I would spend the rest of my life with. I’d never felt this way about someone before, and Sean had said he’d felt the same. I’ve always been a sexually open person and willing to experiment with just about anything, so I’d thought I’d been keeping Sean satisfied. The thought of him wanting a threesome had never even occurred to me. He’d told me at the beginning of our relationship that he’d never want to have a threesome with a woman he loved, saying it’d make him feel as if she were easy or he’d probably be bored of her at that point.
Randomly, some time into our relationship, he asked me if I would have a threesome with my best friend, Carrie. Why her, of all people? When I asked Sean why he’d picked her, he’d simple said because she was convenient. Perhaps the only possible worse person to pick would be an ex love interest of his. This, of course, crushed me. All I could think about was if he even still loved me. Sean tried to reassure me, saying that a threesome was the only thing he’d never tried before and he was curious. I tried to stay open to the idea and to come up with some sort of compromise. I proposed that we try a threesome with another woman, but not necessarily Carrie, and later try one with another man. He immediately turned down the idea, angry at the thought of having to share me with another man. It wasn’t surprising that he’d feel this way, but it was irritating that he expected me to be fine with having to watch him be intimate with another woman.
I couldn’t bring myself to go through with a threesome with Sean and Carrie, and I’m extremely glad I didn’t. As it turns out, the real reason why Sean had chosen Carrie was because he’d had feelings for her. He even admitted to wanting to be with her and ‘couldn’t think of anything more amazing than having us together at the same time.’ It’s no surprise that my relationship with Sean ended badly shortly after this bit of information came out.
They say the number one rule when having a threesome while you’re in a relationship is to never pick a friend. Someone is bound to become jealous or feel left out. So what happens if you pick a third partner that you have absolutely no sexual attraction to? A few years before Sean, I went through an experimental phase with my friend, Anne. We’d decided together to try a threesome with a mutual friend, Mason, that neither of us were attracted to. I was supposed to be the focus; Anne had no interest in touching or being touched by anyone but me. As things were heating up between the three of us, with me in between Anne and Mason, both had a hand down my pants, Anne started to become uncomfortable. She was practically repulsed by Mason’s presence. Although Mason did nothing for me sexually, it was still a turn on to have two people paying so much attention to me. Anne was so turned off that she couldn’t go any further.
Anne and I would get another chance later on, long after Sean and I were over. I’d started dating this guy named Ian. He was a really great person, but I didn’t have quite as deep of feelings for him as I did Sean. It’s probably the only reason why I was able to break the first rule of having a threesome. Ian and I had talked lightly about having a threesome, but he never pressured me or even made any awkward suggestions of who we should pick. I brought up the idea to Anne, but asked her to keep it to herself so I could take some time to think it over. One night, the three of us were watching movies and drinking in Anne’s living room. We’d definitely had too much and Anne was starting to get tired. I’d pretty much decided where I wanted the night to go at this point so I tried to keep her awake by keeping her standing. It worked better than I’d hoped.
Anne started to run her hands up and down my sides, kissing my neck while Ian watched. She pulled me over to the couch and had me kneel in front of her. When our lips met, Ian took it as his cue to join in. He kneeled behind me and pulled on my clothes as I clawed at Anne’s. As we moved to the floor, they were careful not to touch each other, gauging how I handled everything. When I was sure of my own feelings I dragged them on top of me. I felt a small pang of jealousy as I watched Ian enter Anne, but it was quickly replaced by desire at the site of his fingers digging into her hips, her breasts bouncing above me with every thrust. We rolled around on the floor, effortlessly switching the attention from one another until we’d all reached orgasm.
The next morning was surprisingly easy. There was no awkwardness or regret. We joked about the rug burns we’d gotten on our knees and acted completely normal. Ian and Anne kept a distance between each other, comforting any worries I’d felt about them getting too close after the night we had. Later that day, we met up again in Anne’s living room. I’d had no intentions of anything happening, but before I knew it, we were all naked on the floor once again. However, this time was different. We were sober and unsure of ourselves. It’d been so easy to include everyone the night before, but this time I was finding myself left out quite often. Anne was spending way too much time on top of Ian, however, the worst moment was when she kissed him. She hadn’t done that the night before. I definitely wasn’t okay with it, but tried to let it go. It was obvious the next day that we shouldn’t have had that second threesome.
I’m not sure what changed the second go around, or why it was suddenly harder to include everyone. Perhaps the alcohol had dulled our senses, but everything seemed to be more painful the second night. My knees were already stiff and sore; the scratchy carpet was only making it worse. At one point I found myself pinned between Anne and her couch, straddling Ian’s chest. His head was crammed up against the side of the couch while Anne bounced away on him. When I was finally able to break away I instantly became the third wheel. Ian’s head was at such a weird angle that I couldn’t reach him. Anne was so focused on herself that I had to sit and wait, awkwardly petting them to keep some sort of contact going, until she decided to switch positions. Everything had worked out a lot better when we were more focused on satisfying each other, rather than just ourselves.
There are definitely some lessons I learned from these experiences. The sad truth is it’s a lot easier to have a threesome with someone you have more casual feelings for. So what do you when someone you love deeply asks you to participate in one? Or what if you’re the one asking? Speaking from experience, I don’t think the person asking for a threesome should make the first suggestions of who the third party should be, but it is an important decision to agree on. If you’re the one asking for a ménage a trios, it’s not a good idea to propose bringing in your partner’s “hot friend” or someone you’ve dated before, no matter how much you secretly want to do them. Maybe you’ll get lucky and your partner will pick someone you fantasize about. Instead, you could suggest a mutual friend you’ve made as a couple. However, it’s still risky to pick a friend, even if you aren’t very close. I was very fortunate that my relationships with Ian and Anne weren’t ruined. I trusted them enough to know that they had no romantic interest in each other.
Perhaps the safer way of picking a third partner would be to meet someone new together, rather than picking from people you would see on a daily basis. Ladies, be careful who you allow into your bedroom. As shallow as it sounds, you’ll want to pick someone who won’t hurt your self-esteem, for your own sanity. When I was trying to think of a woman I’d allow to join Sean and me, I found that I wasn’t comfortable with anyone in our lives having sex with the man I wanted to marry. I suggested that we go to the “Bunny Ranch” since the women are professionals and constantly tested for STD’s. We would pick a woman at random, never have to see her again, and she would have no emotional attachment to Sean. I quickly dismissed this idea, realizing that all of these women would be gorgeous and thin. I doubted I’d be able to find one that was on the same “hotness level” as me. Of course, Sean didn’t understand this. He just gave me the excuse that he thinks I’m beautiful and no woman could ever compare to me blah, blah. I don’t care how much a man loves me, having a threesome with a woman that looks like a model would send my self-esteem plummeting.
If you aren’t sure you’d be comfortable with a threesome, there are a few alternatives you could suggest. Try bringing toys into the bedroom. If your man wants another woman to join you, try using a male masturbator together, such as a flesh light. You could also watch porn together and copy the positions in the scenes. Doing this can help you feel as if other people are with you, or like you’re a part of the scene. If these don’t seem to satisfy you or your partner, you can offer the same compromise of bringing in another man I tried with Sean. However, ladies, be prepared for your man to have the same reaction that Sean did. Men are more competitive, and a threesome with two men could easily turn into a power struggle. They’d also be self-conscious of who’s bigger and who can last longer. Some men would probably be repelled by the idea of doing such an intimate act with another man so close, even though you could make it clear that they wouldn’t have to touch each other at all.
If you’re like me and pained by the thought of watching the person you love with another woman, but are willing to at least be with one yourself, you could offer allowing your man to watch you and another woman together. Anne and I tried this a few years ago when she was dating a guy that I hated with a passion. There’s no way I’d ever let him come near me so the alternative was to let him watch. In our case, it didn’t end well. Anne’s boyfriend couldn’t stand seeing her with another person and he left the room, crying. Because of my dislike for him, I was okay with continuing what we’d started, even though I think it’s important to stop when the third party leaves the room.
I think one of the reasons why the first ménage a trios with Anne and Ian went so well is because I had set rules in place beforehand. Having guidelines would be important when inviting a friend to join you in the bedroom, but they’re probably a good idea to have anyway, especially if you’re uncomfortable. The three rules I’d had were that Ian had to start with me until I was comfortable, I had to be the one to make him orgasm, and if I wanted to stop or leave the room, they would have to stop, too. I’d had one friend warn me that when she and her boyfriend had a threesome, she left the room when she realized her boyfriend was more interested in her friend. They finished without her! Even with that as horrible as it is, possibly the worst threesome story I’ve heard was another friend who’d tried a threesome with her fiancé. Later that same day she caught her fiancé and the girl they were with having sex. Unless you want an open relationship, make it clear that having a threesome doesn’t allow your significant other to continue any sort of physical relationship with the other person.
Choose what is most important to you, and talk openly with the others involved. It may be an awkward conversation to have, but if you aren’t prepared, you could end up having a regrettable experience. After the second threesome with Ian and Anne, I’d wished that I’d put kissing on my “not okay” list. Even though it’s an innocent act, I found it to be surprisingly personal. Now, I feel as if I didn’t quite put enough thought into what I wanted from Anne and Ian. Aside from all my strange and painful experiences with threesomes, I’m glad I have at least one that I enjoyed. It was sexy, taboo, and just what I needed to spice up my sex life.
If you just read the title and agreed that female ejaculation is indeed just a legend then KEEP READING! Today I have researched some of the best ways to get those lady juices flowing! Female ejaculation, or “squirting” is all but a legend… While seeming possibly harder to achieve for some, it may just be what you are or aren’t doing to instigate such a climax. There are quite a few techniques I have found that can increase your chances of causing this body shaking orgasm! Take my advice… This is pretty good stuff!
foreplay, Foreplay, FOREPLAY!- This step is CRUCIAL for woman to achieve this type of mind-blowing orgasm!
Reading as much as I have been lately on these subjects, I have come to find that a lot of men see foreplay as pointless and boring… I should slap you all! Foreplay is a huge part in sexual activity, but a lot more-so when attempting to make a woman squirt! Simply fooling around before hand with a woman can not only help her climax, but increases the likelihood of stronger and multiple orgasms for her! Men are very visually aroused and therefore can be turned-on by merely seeing a set of breasts they like. Woman on the other hand are more so emotional and sensual and need a little more attention to become aroused and ready! Here are a few suggestion for foreplay techniques to get her into orgasmic readiness:
Talk Dirty: If you have a gal who likes to play naughty then get her engines revved up by telling her how naughty she has been and she will have to make up for it now with your torment and teasing… She’ll love it
Sensual Massage: Touch her all over and send waves of pleasure while relaxing anything else she might be thinking about away! A great way to make the massage more enjoyable are massage oils! You can get flavored, warming or something herbal and calming to set the perfect mood!
Oral: We are always down there on you, so now it’s your turn! Make her tingly and full of anticipation by kissing her thighs and slowly moving your way to her clit! Tease and torture her for a while until she is squirmy and begging for it!
Clitoral Stimulation: This is the easiest way to make a woman orgasm. Clitoral stimulation is a great way for a “warm up” orgasm. Once a woman has had an orgasm, it’s usually easier for her to acheieve multiple orgasms because of the heightened sensitivity!
Although some men find these tasks boring and pointless, you haven’t spent all that time for nothing… Now that she is breathing heavy and wanting you even more, you have just made her g-spot more easily accessible!
Lubrication:It is super important to remember to lube up!
Most woman after foreplay will be wet and ready for some penetration! Other woman have a little trouble creating their own natural lubricant and woman who can become wet easily may not stay that way, so it is always important to have a good lube on hand! Lack of lubrication can cause pain from things like chaffing and you DON’T want that! Silicone based lubricants will last longer than water-based because they don’t absorb like water-bases will. However, if you are using toys, than ALWAYS use a water-based lube to prevent damage to your toy!
Now it’s time to get out your treasure map… Finding a woman’s G-spot can be a grueling task… Some people believe it doesn’t even exist, but they are mistaken… It is said that a woman’s g-spot is located on the front wall of the vagina about 1-3 inches in. The best way to find it’s location put two fingers in palm up and make a “come hither” motion. If all has gone well with your foreplay session, than this soft spongey area should be engorged with blood and a little easier to find.
Introducing toys:Toys can be a great way to help her gush with pleasure!
There are toys available that are designed just for the task of finding the female G-spot! A simple vibrator can change your whole world! Here at Downtown Blue Boutique we have a serious variety of g-spot friendly toys that are curved in all the right places to make the magic happen! Vibration might be needed if regular stimulation isn’t working or if ladies need help achieving it on their own! In some situations, woman cannot orgasm internally with just g-spot stimulation! Sometimes a little clitoral massaging is needed to accomplish this mighty climax! Things like bullets and butterflies are a great way to get clitoral stimulation simuletaneously with g-spot stimulation. Other toys called rabbits are also great because they are designed like an internal vibrator AND have a clitoral stimulator attached!
Other Ways to make the G-spot easier to find:
If you are still having trouble locating the g-spot don’t give up hope! At Downtown Blue Boutique we have things such as the female sexual enhancement pill called G-Spark which sends blood to that area to enlarge it and make it more easily found. Creams like Tickle Her G-Spot, Discover (All Organic!), and the G-spot location cream (This is a kit that comes with a pamphlet FULL of information!) are also available and help engorge the g-spot area with blood!
One last bit of knowledge to know: when a woman is about to squirt that she will feel like she has to pee, SHE DOESN’T! That is when you keep up your “come hither” fingering motion with a bit more force and wait for her to explode! She will find herself shaking from the pleasure and you can pat yourself on the back for probably the most mind-blowing orgasm ever! Oh, and now that you know how to do it, you can repeat when necessary and continue to rock her world with your new magic trick! Always remember that proper foreplay and lubrication are crucial for this task and you will be an Ejaculation Master yet!
OK, ladies, I am going to jump right into this blog and put my opinion out there. This is just my opinion, so don’t copy what I do when it comes to your personal decisions about sex. Sex is just that, personal to each relationship. With that said, let me tell you about my personal life as of late. Bear with me.
A little over a month ago, I got a raging UTI. (I know – TMI). I was put on an antibiotic and started feeling better. As luck would have it, the week of Christmas I started to feel like I was coming down with something. By December 26, the day I flew into Utah, I needed a visit to Instacare. Another antibiotic, inhalers, pain meds and a diagnosis of bronchitis was beginning to ruin my trip. By New Year’s Eve I was in the Heber City emergency room with a diagnosis of pneumonia. Fluids and IV antibiotics allowed me to spend New Year’s Eve in my hotel bed listening to my family celebrate in the next room. While still gasping for breath, I got a bad GI bug the day we were heading home to San Antonio. I remember walking through the airport willing myself home to the comfort of my bed. I couldn’t breathe, I couldn’t eat, and I had no energy. I was a mess! Several more days of yuckiness ensued, and then magically I woke-up last week a new woman. I could breath, I could eat, I could walk up the stairs! I wanted sex! Really badly I wanted sex! I kept dreaming about wanting sex! It was amazing!
I felt almost perfect for two whole days! And then something happened. The next day I woke-up with a little cough, and it got worse, and worse, and worse! So today, I spent the afternoon at the hospital again! This time I have the flu–the genuine real live flu virus! And bronchitis and pneumonia! What the flippin’ heck!!!! So here we go again with round two.
So you ask, why am I sitting here in the middle of the night, all achy and coughing, writing a blog? Well, today when my wonderful, kind, fantastic, loving husband spent yet another day with me at the hospital, it dawned on me how great he has been throughout this whole crummy ordeal. Then I started to think about the few days I really wanted sex, needed sex, and was craving sex! I realized that I haven’t even thought about his sexual interests during all of this. We have had tons of intimate moments, snuggling, watching movies and such, but he hasn’t been sexually fed. Heck, this ordeal has been going on for almost six weeks! That is a long time when you consider we usually have a very healthy and vigorous sex life. It’s time for me find a way for him to enjoy some sexual pleasure with me.
Now, for clarification, I am not a huge fan of the word “masturbation”. Even though the word has gotten a bum rap out there in the world, it does have a negative connotation—often associated shame, embarrassment, and with hiding it from the partner. I prefer to promote “couple exploration and touch”. The partners are right there with each other, participating as much as possible. In this way, it is done with love and respect for each other. It lets the other person know that you’re thinking of him or her and that you love them. You might even pick out some toys for them to use. There are many products made for men. One in particular I like is the Tenga egg. (Come pick one up at the Blue Boutique and surprise your guy!) In fact, in the last few years, there are a ton of new products for men. Of course, most men just need a great lube (like Gun Oil, Stroke 69, or Pjur), and then nothing is more arousing than having you lying there as imagery for him. Sometimes it’s all we can do after we’ve had a long hard day, or in my case, 6 weeks of fighting off illnesses, but it lets him know that we care. No worries ladies, we will get our turn at being pleasured. Start your wish list as you lay there modeling.
Well, now that a few weeks have passed and everyone has pretty much thrown those silly resolutions to the curb, why don’t you try something that will actually improve your life…like better sex! We all know how easy it is to slip into a rut and use the same go-to positions that always get the job done, but why not try and mix it up with a few new maneuvers? Who knows, you may just discover something that thrusts you into a whole new level of ecstasy. To get you started, we’ve got the top 13 new positions to try out this new year.
The Pretzel
Have him kneel and straddle your left leg while you’re lying on your left side. Bend your right leg around the right side of his waist—allowing him full access to your vagina. This setup gives complete access to your clitoris for manual stimulation. But don’t feel limited to solely hands on fun. Have him try withdrawing his penis and, while holding the shaft with his left hand, rub the head against your clitoris. Start out soft and slow, then increase speed and pressure, and reinsert once you’ve been brought to the brink of an orgasm.
School House Rock
First find a chair with a sturdy back, have him sit facing forward. Straddle him with your feet on the floor, slowly lowering yourself onto his erection with your knees bent at a ninety-degree angle. Once he’s fully penetrated you, begin to slowly rock back and forth.
Stand and Deliver
This position can be challenging, but it’s great for women who like it when their partners are in control – and have some serious upper body strength. He stands and lifts you up so that you can wrap your legs around his waist. From there he’ll cup your backside and slowly move to enter you, controlling the depth of penetration. For balance, have him stand near a bed or a wall.
Leap Frog
You will have to sit on your partner, who is also sitting, and let him enter you slowly. Slowly start to squat and make him lift his body up in a squat as well. Use his body to support yourself and thrust in order to increase satisfaction and reach an orgasm. Your body will be exposed to him so he can touch you as well. This increases friction and penetration, thus increasing pleasure.
Spank Me Maybe
As he sits up with his legs extended, straddle him reverse cowgirl–style, but with your legs extended back and your torso down between his thighs and shins. He’ll love the unforgettable rear view and how easy it is for him to gently smack your butt. Amp up things by telling him to tug on your tresses a little.
The Thighmaster
Have him lie on his back and bend one of his legs, keeping the other outstretched. Straddle the raised leg with a thigh on either side and then lower yourself onto his member so that your back is facing him. From here, you should hold his knee and use it for support as you rock up and down. His raised knee allows you to rub against his thigh—which provides you with optimal clitoral stimulation.
Peep Show
This creative position allows you to show off some yoga skills while providing him with the visual stimulation that guys always crave. Start out lying on your back with your knees bent and legs in the air, and have him get on his knees in front of you. Keep your head straight as he holds your ankles and lifts your butt and lower torso off the bed to the level of his penis. Once he’s inside you, spread your knees as far apart as you can for a show he’ll never forget.
The Flatiron
Lie face down on the bed with your knees slightly bent and hips slightly raised. For comfort, and to increase the angle of your hips, you can place a pillow under your lower abs. From here, have him enter from behind, squeezing your thighs with his and propping himself up on his arms. This position creates a snug fit—which intensifies your pleasure as well by making him feel larger.
The Lap Dance
It’s simple, but remains underrated. Facing your back to him, you lower yourself onto his member and stand/sit/lounge against him, while he rests against the couch, table, bath tub, office chair. Start rotating rhythmically in circles or figure eights.
Mission Control
With him lying on his back, have him lift his knees to his chest. Then straddle his hips, and squat so your thighs hug his. Before you lower yourself onto him, take your panties, bathrobe tie, or a pair of fuzzy handcuffs, and tie his wrists to the bedposts so you’re in total control.
The Greyhound
Lay on the bed on your stomach with your legs spread out. Have him kneel between your legs and lift you by the hips until he’s able to enter you, keeping as much of your body on the bed as possible. In essence, your entire body is being stretched out for him and the elongated angle will tighten your vagina, proving a very snug fit.
The Butterfly
Lie down at the edge of your bed or your kitchen platform and let your legs fall over the edge. Get him to kneel or stand at the edge of the bed or platform and slowly lift the small of your back as he enters you. Rest your legs on his shoulders. This is an exciting position as it lets the blood rush to your head as he enters you. It’s sure to take you over the edge in no time!
Vibrating V
Straddle him, face-to-face, in a chair. Grasp the back of his neck or shoulders for balance, then lift your legs so your calves are on his shoulders, and ride him. Since his hands will be free and your clitoris will be front and center, have him use a vibrator on it for a killer simultaneous orgasm.
Ladies, how many times have you heard a version of that phrase in the last few weeks? With a new year comes the message to lose weight, exercise, eat right, and feel great. In fact, I just heard a radio ad from a plastic surgeon who will help you look great by doing your year-end taxes and putting the refund towards your boob job!
I’ll be the first to admit that I could afford to drop a pound or ten, and the box of chocolates in my nightstand probably isn’t helping. However, sexiness is so much more than “boobalicious” breast implants or losing a few inches. It is about being a strong and confident woman.
One of the easiest and most fun ways to feel sexy and confident in the bedroom is by wearing lingerie. When it comes to arousal, men are more driven by visual stimuli, whereas women are more emotionally motivated. Putting on some lingerie can make you feel sexy, and he’s going to think that you look sexy! Regardless of why you put it on, it probably won’t stay on long. (It’s ironic that the better the lingerie is, the less time you wear it).
There are other great benefits to lingerie. For example, it’s a fantastic way to indicate to your partner that “it’s play time”. A good friend of mine shared with me that she slips on something sexy at bedtime as her way of letting her husband know that she is ready for some action. Not only does she use lingerie as a “communication device”, she also uses it to enhance her assets while hiding what she calls “flaws”. She does this with a nice corset, fishnet tights, a garter belt, and crotchless panties. Of course, I’d throw on a pair of stiletto heels to polish off the ensemble.
Maybe you want to reserve the corset and all its grandeur for luxurious occasions. Depending on your mood, you may consider other choices: sheer, lacy, leather, or latex. How are you feeling about next weekend? Demure, kinky, erotic, seductive? How about fantasy? Perhaps French maid, dominatrix, or naughty librarian? Are you enhancing your long legs or nice boobs? Maybe you’re covering stretch marks from your wonderful kiddos (that’s me). You can even make it as simple as slipping on a thong so that when you bend over, he gets a hint of things to come.
The bottom line is that lingerie can be good for women and our relationship! No matter what our shape, size, or age, we can feel sexy and confident in lingerie. Lingerie gives us the confidence to be playful and flirt. Tease him, taunt him, make him drool. Exude that sexual confidence that he finds so attractive.
Blue Boutique has every lingerie choice you could ever imagine! And this is the perfect time to shop! Pick up a little something to surprise him on Valentine’s Day. If you need a shopping buddy, drop by at the end of January. I always love spending other people’s money!
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